Saturday, January 29, 2005

You need a lots of love

You need a lots of love
To change thing

You need a lots of love
To move moutain

You need a lots of love
To keep doing what you want to do

You need a lots of love
To get things moving when it ain't moving

You need a lots of love
to keep you moving

because of him*

those are the days, that i was beloved by him
those are the days, that he hugged me tightly
those are the days, while i was naive

to believe in him
regardless time, length, distant...
everything out of nothing

in the world, i feel timid
i feel small
so i allowed my small, petite, fragile body to lean agaisnt him.

regardless in reality or dreaming,
he's always there
always there

never did i realized how silly i could be because of him*
underestimated myself, that i could get touched so easily by him
underestimated myself, that i could get drunk in it and
allowed myself in this...

but, becuase of him,
because of him, i have the encouragement
because of him, then i realized all the story doesn't needed to end with ' happy ending'
just by loosing him...only i know i do not need that arm around me

i used to wait for him endlessly
weak enough to admit that i needed him* badly...
but
today im all alone,
still im surviving
yet when i am lonely, he isn't there
i used to cling to him, did not want anythng else than him
but now, even when im tearing, i using my own hand to wipe off...not his
just as he loved me that much, still he's gone...

I only a girl...
I only a human..
but just as he left
i realized that i do not need him
i still surviving
i still breathing
by loosing him
only i realized that his loves changed me

as a lonely path comes hit me...i am there alone
that i see clearly
i do not need that warmess
i can survive alone
no doubt im only human....


Friday, January 28, 2005

scenario

i heard a story...the story goes like this

A man is in the jungle, He needed to get out of the jungle before 8pm which the night falls.
He woke up at 7 while the night is clearing for the day to enter.
He knows that he must keep walking so he could get out of the jungle before 8pm
so he walks ..walks..walks...walks
till he felt thirsty...
the mind is fighting with his physical
the mind yelled him not to stop
the physical yelled him to get water...
he keeps walking ...
both are yelling at him, non-stop
he pause...he needed to get water, if not he will dyhederated
so he went to search for a river
he tells himself, only 5 min.
when he reached the river, he's hot
he tells himself, while i drink,must well i drip myself in it..so i get both
he tells himself, only 10 min
as he wanted to jump into the river...
he saw a gold chain...a big 1
he tells himself, i dive in, get the gold chain, drink the water, take a dip and head back on track
but when he dived in, he can't see the gold chain, he jump out
the gold chain is there...
he repeated for couple of time...the gold chain was never found under the water
then he realized is ...on top the tree...is the reflection that he saw
so he tells himseld he will climb up the tree, grab the gold chain and then back on track
and he keeps on trying to climb the tree..he gets hungry
he saw fruits on the tree..
but he saw others fruity fruit on others tree...
so he tells himself, after i grab the gold chain, and feed himself, he will get back on track
so when he climb another tree, he saw more nicer juicy fruits on others tree...
the list go on....


To stay focus sound easy...to get distracted is even more easier ...to ignore and neglect to do the simple things is easiest...to not to do anything is the most easiest.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

DOWN PISSS

what do i do when i miss some1 so much till it hurts
what do i do when i already confess not than once nor twice?
what do i do when they just don't care?
what do i do with their life when i know and i see their downpit coming?
what do i do?

i ain't no angel
i ain't no saint
i ain't no hero

for jus a mere soul
searching for the meaning of LIFE
searching for the meaning of LOVE

LOVE beyond eye of beholder
LOVE beyond of parent love
LOVE beyond sista love, brotha love...

im searching for eternity

what do i do to convey the message
what do i do to let you know
that what's my need and want
whereby you are just a passerby

searching for meaning of life?
can we work hand in hand?

to search for eternity?

i belief in 1 thing...

WHEN I AM DOING MY BEST
THE FORMLESS SUBTANCE
THE HIGHEST SUPREME
THE ABOVE OF ALL MIGHTY
WILL READ ME
WILL HEARS
ME
WILL SEES ME
ABOVE ALL SHINNING STARS
AND DELIVER MY BELIEF
MY ACTION
MY THOUGHT
ME ...MY BEING
INTO ANOTHER STATE
ANOTHER STAGE
ANOTHER DIAGONAL
ANOTHER LIFE
ANOTHER POINT

WHERE I WILL MEET MY SUCCESS
WAITING UNPATIENTLY ...

YET STILL
IM DELIVERING
IM DOING THE UNDO
IM ACHIEVING THE UNACHIEVABLE

philosophy thought

When the 'going'get tough
the 'tough' gets going

When the 'going'get tough
the 'tough' gets going

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